Thursday, January 29, 2009

Seriously? Nah, just kidding.

It looks as though we may be attending a new church soon (don't ask me about it on here because I'm feelin' too lazy to explain and have very few details...maybe in another post? K.) Anyway, I have decided this will probably be a good time to start having adult conversations with people...the mature serious all the time kind...instead of the ones I usually have that sound a lot like this one I had with one of my friends at church last night:

My Friend: So Christi, I have been trying to call you all week now but you won't answer your phone and you won't call me back.

Me: Well My Friend, I don't usually have my volume on.

My Friend: Why?

Me: Because I went to a comedy show a couple of months ago and there was this hypnotist there and now every time I hear a phone ring I bark like a dog and shove a banana in my ear.

My Friend: Seriously?

Me: Nah, Just kidding.

My Friend: I left you a voicemail

Me: Don't check those either.

My Friend: Well that is ridiculous. Why have a phone then? I think you need to stop being like that and turn up the volume on your phone.

Me: Well I think you should turn the volume down on your mouth.

My Friend: Fine, I will just come to your house.

Me: You were not invited and I won't answer the door. I'm not even sure I like you.

My Friend: Well I am very sure I do not like you.

Me: Great. Glad we agree.

My Friend: Oops. I'm late for choir practice. Call me tomorrow?

Me: Of Course!

Nonsense right?

I have a hard time transitioning into seriousness so I'm thinking I should just start my conversations with the intention of being completely serious and fight the urge to say things that will make other people ask if I am being serious. I really don't want to scare these poor new people or make them cry or have Rocky come home and say, "there were 138 complaints in the complaint box at church this morning and guess how many of them have your name in the subject line?"
Then I would be all like:

Are you serious?

and he would be all:

(insert face of despair and disappointment)

and I would be all:

I was kidding!

and he would be all:

Christi, you can't be telling people that "The Message" bible was written by the devil. They didn't know you were kidding.

Then I would be all:

I wasn't kidding.

and he would be all:

Seriously?

and then I would say:

Nah, just kidding.

See how complicated that could get?

6 comments:

Donna said...

You are one weird lady!

Sandra said...

You did not come from your daddy's loins. This has to be the most ridiculous of posts from you. I know you can do better! LOL

Sandra said...

Why didn't you post about the new church instead of all of this nonsense, which I am sure took more energy than telling about the new church?

Mindy said...

You are funny!

Can't wait to hear about the new church.....

Donna said...

Come on Christi, spill it....don't leave us hanging!!
Also my above comment was meant with the utmost respect for my 'weird' daughter. :-)

Lisa @ The Preacher's Wife said...

LOL I love IT! You didn't tell me y'all decided for shure!!!

Seriously??

Call me. :))

If my volume isn't up leave a message so I can't call you back...LOLOL