Friday, October 31, 2008

Thursday, October 30, 2008

I'm Quitting School...

I picked Kayla up from school a couple of weeks ago and she said, "I'm quitting school, it costs too much to graduate." I agreed. She is quitting tomorrow.

haha. not really.

Seriously though, dang. Senior year is ridiculous expensive...if you want your kid to have
Senior Pictures - approx. $300-400 (plus a $75 sitting fee)
A Cap and Gown - $40
Graduation Invitations (and all the stuff that goes with them) - $160
Senior Prom - $200-300
Yearbook - $50 etc... (And these are only the necessities)
And could one of you guys buy this poor kid a car?

Hope you have an extra $Grand$ or so laying around when your kid is a Senior or at least plenty of candles and bottled water when your utilities get shut off. lol
note to self: pay power bill today before 5.

Btw, I ordered the 'Poor Boy Package' of invitations so I may have to ask you to read the invitation, re-seal the envelope and forward it to the next address.

And to think, this is my easy one. Jordan and Jade will graduate back to back.
Wonder if it is too late to start home schooling?

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Things That Annoy Me

Walmart on a Saturday
Running out of toilet paper
Putting down my ink pen and 2 seconds later finding the remains where my dog ate it
When the sheet pops off the matress
Getting excited about cooking something good but it requires milk and the milk is gone
Forgetting to wash my hair while I'm in the shower
Running out of coffee
Having to keep useless paperwork because one day..maybe in 10 years or never..you might need it
Being told at 7 a.m. by a kid that they 'don't have anything clean to wear to school'.
Cell Phones
People who spend $500 on a t-shirt
Bees
Spiders
Pumping Gas

To Be Continued...

Ms. Grumpy Pants

Yesterday at Mamaws...

Me: Hi Mamaw
Mamaw: Hey, why are you here?
Me: I'm here to see you and I thought you might be hungry...want some lunch?
Mamaw: Well, if I knew who's house I was in, maybe. I had to hunt for the bathroom. Who are these people who live with me.
Me: This is your house. No one lives here with you. Darla spends the night.
Mamaw: Why?
Me: Errrr
Me: Did mom come see you yesterday?
Mamaw: I don't know
Me: She brought you some HOT Taco Bell didn't she?
Mamaw: Oh, yeah. Look of disdain. Why do they keep moving me?
Me: They don't, this is your house.
Mamaw: giving me the crooked one eye stare, OH! PHHUUMP.
Me: So...you hungry?
Mamaw: Well, I guess, there probably isn't anything to eat though.
Me: I'll go check it out...back to the living room...You have some Chick-Fil-A Nuggets in there
Mamaw: Oh. Goody.
Me: hehe, huh? Are you being sassy?
Mamaw: Crooked eye stare
Me: Or, you have some cup 'o soup.
Mamaw: That sounds good.
After Lunch and Back to The Chair
Me: Have you listened to any good tapes?
Mamaw: NO
Me: Hmm, o.k. Turning the tape on anyway....
After a few minutes of awkward conversation
Me: Well, I have to go pick up a kid. Darla will be here soon!
Mamaw: I'm getting sick of being moved. You tell them to quit moving me so much.
Me: Okey Dokey.

So...Stop moving Mamaw. She is getting grumpy about it. :p

Monday, October 27, 2008

When You Live In RossVegas

People make fun of my town a lot but there is at least one reason you gotta love it...

After cleaning mom's kitchen/deck today...and after picking Jade up from school and taking Kayla to work, I decided to come home and nap for an hour until it was time to pick up Jordan at basketball practice.
Of course I was running a few minutes late, as usual. Still had on my cleaning clothes...hoodie and very baggie sweatpants topped off with a greasy ponytail. It wasn't until I got to school that I remembered that there was a Parent Meeting for all the basketball kids! Ugh.
Since I was late already I couldn't come home and change so I had to dig around in the van for a pair of jeans (which I found..don't judge..I knew they would come in handy) and run into the cafeteria hoping no one would notice that my hoodie was dusty, my hair was greasy and the jeans I had on were about 3 inches too short for me. Turns out, the meeting was very unnecessary and no one seemed too repulsed at my appearance which brings me to why I love my town...80% of the people look like I did today on purpose so when I get caught off guard it's o.k.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Toby's Baaack

I'm super duper excited about the WinterJam Tour this year. I just had to share the lineup and remind you that the tickets are only $10 at the door! Hello?! $10. Now the down side is the line that you have to get in early and stand in until the doors open to ensure you get in. Ok, I'm getting ahead of myself. Who will be there?

TOBY MAC
HAWK NELSON
NewSong (since they host it)
Brandon Heath?
Stephanie Smith? (there are always a couple of new artists to open up while everyone is coming in)
And the speaker:
TONY NOLAN

It's Jan. 9th at the UTC Arena (in case you are as super duper pumped as I am)

Now, my first thought was to ditch the youth group and just take my kids and see if you guys wanted to come too! I'll have to confirm that I can ditch the youth group though. We probably won't be doing a winter retreat so we may have to do this with them. But, even if that is the case...we can still all meet up. If you have never seen Toby Mac in concert...your life is not complete.

Now, a hilarious story:
A couple of years ago we took the youth and since we had to wait for people to get off of work and kids to get out of school, we didn't get there until 5:30 ish. The line on both sides of the arena was backed up to the projects. It was crazy crowded. So our bus guy let us out at the front on the sidewalk and we were gathering up to walk to the way far far far away back of the line....low and behold, God showed His favor upon us and opened up a new second line just for us, because we are Shiloh and Jesus loves us mostly. So, we took it. Walked up the steps and were almost at the very front. Well, apparently this blessing was not recieved well with a church group beside us who had obviously been standing in line for 2-3 hours to get that coveted spot.

They were all: Oh, huh uh. We have been here since creation and it's not fair that you jump ahead of everyone else.

Me and all the kids: Whistling...did you hear that? Hear what? Thinking: Omg, are we fixing to have a church group fight?

Rocky: Ma'am, Sirs, this line opened. We didn't break. We just got in the line.

Disgruntled and Obviously Not Right with Jesus Church People: You can't just get up in the front like that...most of us are church groups and that is just not right when we have been here longer.

Me and all the kids in our football type huddle: I'll take the big lady...you girls, take the other girls and maybe some of the smaller guys....boys, take the guys and grown men. Ready? BREAK!

Rocky: Look, we don't want anyone to be mad..blah blah blah...yadda yadda...we aren't moving. Rocky is an excellent discussion haver when people are disgruntled.

So we have ourselves a stand off.

Me & very nervous church kids: Just don't look them in the eye. Keep your heads down and look straight ahead. Me: I'm moving to the front and leaving the boys in back to take the first blows...who's with me?

Not a moment too soon, the doors opened up...we all got in safely and sat in a sweet spot away from the haters.

Who says Christian concerts are boring?

Since We Are All NUTS...

I was inspired by the discussion about how we are all NUTS so I took it upon myself to find out what kind of nut I really am. I took this quiz: http://www.hotfact.com/what-kind-of-nut-are-you.html

And as it turns out, I am exactly the nut I predicted I would be...

a. Peanut—Down-to-earth, no-nonsense and self-assured. With a good sense of humor and a healthy dose of level-headed perspective, you’re a true blue, classic nut, who can stand alone or mix well with everyone.

I am very curious to see what kind of NUTS the rest of you are.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

I Remember...

I remember the time when dad took us to some random playground and we were on the merry go round. It was some sort of bug with antennas and Lisa was holding on to those antennas...and we were all, "push faster daddy, faster faster faster faster" and Lisa was all, "I CAN'T HOLD ON..I'M GONNA FALL." and we were still, "so. Faster daddy faster faster faster." and then Lisa was slung off. We didn't get to stay long after that. Thanks Lisa. :-p

Edit: It was Nikki, not Lisa who fell off. Lisa is officially off the hook for ruining a perfectly fun merry-go-round ride.

I Like...

I like the colors on the 'Bonny Hunt Show' set but I can't find anything that will tell me what the colors are called so I can buy them. I can't even find a picture of it to show you what I'm talking about. You can see them a little bit if you go to the website but they are all on videos. If you can find this out for me, that would be great. And just to juice up the pot a little, I'm giving away a free bag of tootsie rolls to the first person who can get me this information!

I just threw up a little in my mouth



I just don't know what to say. Well, that isn't entirely true. I can't think of anything nice to say. In case you can't tell, that is Barak Obama's face.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

I Like...

These shoes...
This Jacket...
And these shoes...
Been web-surfing at Target again. Don't you think they are cute or should I watch more "What not to wear"?


I Voted!

I took advantage of the early voting option and cast my ballot today! Yay! Election day is going to be madness. Guess who I voted for?! haha

I Remember...

I remember when Lisa got a perm and her hair was bigger than her body.

Try-outs

This week is basketball try-outs at Rossville Middle School. Jordan and Jade are both doing it. There are 50+ girls trying to get on the basketball team!! Last year they barely had enough to fill the Varsity and JV but this year they are having 3 cuts. I'm sick nervous about it. I want them both to make it. They both try really hard. But, what makes me sick nervous is that I'm afraid one will make it and one won't. That will be sad. I would almost rather them both get cut. bad mommy. I feel a life-lesson moment coming on. Or maybe I'm just underestimating the fabulousness of my kids?!

I'll let ya know how it goes!

On the plus side, report cards came out at the Middle School. Jade made all A's and Jordan made Honor Roll. Still waiting on Kayla's.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Remember me...

I get a kick out of funny tombstone sayings like this:

I told you that I was sick!-- Georgia Cemetary, USA

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake; Stepped on the gas instead of the brake.-- Pennsylvania Tombstone, USA

Here lies Lester Moore; Four slugs from a .44; No Les No More.-- Tombstone Arizona

So, with this in mind, I was in Sunday School a few weeks ago and the Scripture was covering 1 Samuel 4. I have read most of the Bible but this was not something I noticed before. I laughed out loud and disrupted the class but I thought it was hilarious. The Scripture read:

18
And it came to pass, when he made mention of the ark of God, that he fell from off the seat backward by the side of the gate, and his neck brake, and he died: for he was an old man, and heavy. And he had judged Israel forty years.

Now isn't this how all of us would like to be remembered? Old and fat? Do you think poor Eli knew that one of the last words said about him would mention him being a Fatty McFatFat?

I don't think I want to know what comes to mind when people think about me. :-p

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Lost Photos










These are a few pictures I took but they got lost on the computer.

Rare Sister Sightings








Christmas 2004-2007
I just ran across these while looking at Halloween pictures and thought they were cute! I have very few pictures will all the girls together so these are some of my favorites.

Halloween Revisited





The Pirate and the Princess - 2005
Bee & Angel - 2006
Cat & Mouse - 2007
Now we are trying to figure out what we are going to be this year. I have some of Kayla too in case you were all wondering, the problem is she was invented before the digital camera. :-p
This year we are going completely homemade. Whatever it is, it has to be something we already own. Betcha can't wait to see what we come up with, huh? Me too! Any Suggestions?
I suggested cutting off some tree branches and hot gluing them to their sleeves and letting them be trees.








I think...

I think if I were married to Joel Osteen I would punch him in the face a lot. Does he sound and talk like that all the time? ~shudder~

I think Barak Obama is a very arrogant man. I think he is a poser and if he gets elected the only people who will profit are the people who are living off the government already. I also think that the combination of Barak Obama, Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reed would be the equivalent of the unholy trinity.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

"Your mom musta raised you strange"

That is what mamaw said to me today, "Your mom musta raised you strange." I agreed with her. :-)

I didn't go to mamaws until around 3 today and she was hungry. If you ever try to feed mamaw you find out pretty quick that nothing sounds good to her. Today I gave her the choice of a warmed up hamburger, a warmed up corn dog or potato soup. She chose the soup. The problem was that it wasn't really potato soup. It was chicken corn chowder. haha. But she doesn't like chicken if you ask her so I stopped telling her when I feed her chicken. She wasn't in love with it. I think she thought it was pretty nasty and couldn't figure out why it didn't taste like Marsha's potato soup. The conversation today went something like this:

Mamaw: Where do I live?
Me: You live here.
Mamaw: Where is here?
Me: Erm, Rossville?
Mamaw: This tastes different.
Me: Well this soup has carrots in it too...maybe you ate a carrot thinking it should taste like a potato. Next time think carrot. haha
Mamaw: hehe, huh?
Mamaw: Who lives here?
Me: You do.
Me: remember I used to come up here and you would be popping beans?
Mamaw: Popping beans? What?
Me - (explaining what bean popping looks and sounds like)
Mamaw: haha, Your mom musta raised you strange.
Me: yes, yes she did.
Mamaw: Where do I live?
Me: Las Vegas...kidding...you live here, in Rossville, on Peachtree Street.
Mamaw: hmmm, this tastes strange.
(cut to after the dumping of the soup and replacing it with chocolate pie) :-)
Next 20 min......where do I live...here....when did I move here....erm, IDK...Who lives here with me....Nobody, but Darla spends the night...Oh....Where do I live?

After Lunch:
Scene - walking down the hall
Mamaw: does someone live under the house?
Me: no, that is just your basement where you have all your canned food...you know, those popped beans.
Mamaw (who is now poot walking) - well those beans aren't the only things popping!! hahahaha
Me: Dang mamaw, I had my mouth open and everything...you need to warn someone if you are gonna start popping.
Mamaw: poot, giggle, poot, giggle, poot, giggle
Me: Holy cow Mamaw! Let me walk in front!!

Good times, good times.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Focus People

Ok. Let's not keep putting this off. This year we are planning ahead.

Halloween Night...

Place: Mom's
Time: ??
Food: ??

Do I need to bring a candy bag for my kids or will Granny have some?

I think we should all be there at 5...before it gets dark. Is everyone o.k. with that?

Any food suggestions? I'm open.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

a little dysFUNctional

I remember throwing a softball through the kitchen window when mom wasn't home. It was totally an accident, I was trying to throw it on the roof and then catch it when it came down but missed. If I had an older sister to pass with, maybe it wouldn't have happened...but I digress. Dad was home and he rushed off to the store, bought a new piece of glass and fixed the window before mom got home. Can you say SuperHero?

I remember going to McDonald's, which was a rare treat back in the day, and I was sitting in the front seat holding everyone's drinks. Mom decided we were gonna do a little something special and eat at the park, whoop whoop! When she turned into the place we were going to park I wasn't expecting the turn or the hump we went over and it threw me forward, crushing half of the drinks and spilling most of them. Oh, the horror and utter sadness over ruining this cool thing we were doing. But mom didn't yell at me! She said, "it's not your fault, I should have told you we were turning." huh? Really? And then, instead of giving the loser kid who spilled the drinks the one that had very little beverage left in it, she took it and gave me and the other loser kids (lisa, nikki) the other ones. AwWwW. Not getting in trouble and/or being punished...priceless.

I remember the Christmas that I peeked in the living room through that weird folding doorway we had and seeing mom putting out Christmas presents. I was the year that someone got cowboys and indians? Not sure who...I just remember that.

I remember being in awe of Casey singing "The Grundy County Auction...hey pretty lady won't you give me a sign, I'll do anything to make you mine all mine, I'll do your bidding and be at your beck and call....yeah never seen anyone looking so fine, man I gotta have her she's a one of a kind, I'm goin' once goin' twice...I'm sold to the lady in the second row she's an 8 she's a 9 she's a 10 I know, she's got ruby red lips blonde hair blue eyes and I'm about to bid my heart goodbye....she was only like 3 years old. And how she could 'read' a book by memorizing all the words when she was, what? 2? Alien kid. Fo' sho.

I remember phrases, "no eating crackers in the bed"..."you won't go to hell for listening to country music"..."you can invite everyone in your class to your slumber party but they probably won't come"

I know there were a lot of things in between my memories that were probably a lot less memorable but still good. It just makes me wonder what my kids will remember about their childhood. I think that I will probably pull out the wire coat hanger and cut all their hair off if they ever complain about it.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Mandatory Family Togetherness

Halloween is fast approaching and everyone is expected to be at mother's house. That is not a request, that is an order. (unless you are an internet surfing, stumbled on this blog, non-family member....you are not invited, don't come, that is creepy.)

Now, all that is left to do is tell Nikki (who needs to be blog pressured so she can keep up too) and figure out who is bringing what and someone to give me some ideas on how to dress up my kids for $5 or less. :-)

Casey, you and Kayla need the Barak and McCain masks from the Balloon factory. You can hand out candy and give unreasonable campaign promises. Casey/Barak: "Take my candy and I will make the government pay for your healthcare and give you a free home." Kayla/McCain: "Take my candy because I'm old and may not be around next Halloween to give you any more."

Lisa, Kayla said you should be Sarah Palin. I think that would be SA-Wheat! Noone has to be Joe Biden because noone really cares if he is around or not.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Say it ain't so Joe...

I think that was my favorite line from the vice presidential debate. "Say it ain't so Joe"! haha. That was great.
Sarah did a good job. I think she was even cracking Joe Biden up a little bit. Now it is John McCain's turn to throw it down and start defending himself and make known Obama's shadiness.
Next debate Tuesday! Wonder if Casey is working........