Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Why Dost Thou Hateth Me So?

Y'all I still can't get ABC to let me watch LOST. CBS let me watch the Amazing Race and Survivor but ABC won't budge. Who is this vile creature who goes by the name ABC? What transgressions have I commited against thee? I have requested access to your vault of rerun webisodes for half a fortnight but alas my efforts have been in vain. Thou teaseth me by loading a mere 30% each time only to shatter my hope and freeze my computer.

Is it because I haven't brushed my hair? Is there a dress code to attend this shindig? Are my theories better than the ones the writers have thought up and they are feeling intimidated?

I am fixing to just hop on a plane and go to the island and just ask Sawyer what has been going on. He'll tell me....(after he makes fun of me and calls me names)

I guess I will just have to invest in a pair of headphones and hook up the laptop at church in the Pastors office and catch up. Don't think I won't!

In Other News...

Jordan ran her first track meet yesterday. She was scheduled to run in 3 events but since there isn't a coach in this entire area that is qualified to do the job they sign up for it was unorganized and chaotic so they decided to cut the last event. Anyway, she was running the 400...(I wasn't there because I had other kids to pick up from work and take home and so forth and so on...just say what you are thinking, "Bad Mommy!") Where was I? Oh, she was running the 400...Now here is where I need to give a back story.

Jordan said that her coaches told them that they needed running shoes with spikes and that it was ok not to have them for the first meet but Jordan is not very patient and she hearts new shoes so she went ahead and found some. Now, for those of you who do not know, the spikes are metal and you can only wear the metal spikes on grass or rubber tracks (please don't ask what the heck a rubber track is because I am just repeating what I was told and have absolutely no knowledge on the subject..just work with me)
anyway, she asked her coaches if the shoes were ok and they said yes. So...she put the spikes on her shoes and got ready for the race. This was a full on track meet...hurdle jumping and all...so she was there for almost 3 hours before the race she was in started (that tidbit has no relevance to my story at all)

Finally, it was time for her race. She started in the back of the pack but before she got to the 3rd turn she was in 2nd and about to take 1st...and then...she fell! The stupid track was stupid asphalt and the dumb underqualified coaches didn't think to mention that or didn't know or didn't care or maybe aren't even coaches at all but just a couple of random parents with whistles...(I have underqualified coach turrets.) So of course when the spikes got hot the shoes got slick and my kid did a number on her kneecap and her ankle.

Que: "Chariots of Fire" song....

This, my friends, is why my kid is better than your kid... Instead of renting her clothes, gnashing her teeth and curling up in the fetal position wailing like a baby, MY KID picked herself up and finished running her race...gimped up ankle, bloody knee and all. Granted it was probably pride that kept her from crying and quitting and we all know that pride cometh before the fall...BUT...in this case the fall cameth before the pride so I'm pretty sure that is ok. :D

Now I get to go buy my kid some new running shoes before the next track meet because I'm sure we are all now aware that the underqualified coaches have no idea which shoes should be worn on which track and since the only solution to that problem that I can think of is to put metal spikes on their shoes and insist they run around the track to see if they slide and bust their face on it...it is better to be safe than sorry (sorry for causing a huge scene if my kid falls again because I will and people will cry and it won't be anyone related to me) Amen.


Mindy said...

I say go on over to the preacher's office and watch it.....
sorry about the fall on the asphalt....hope the next meet goes better.

Brooke said...

I. cannot. believe. you. still. haven't. watched. LOST!!!!!!!

Get to the library or something!!! haha

I'm sorry to hear about your daughter's fall...I can totally sympathize. Well, not really because I've never tried running in spikey shoes or even considered track as a fun sport (running is fun?)
However, I have fell in front of lots of people on numerous occasions!!!! (and I was just walking.) (I didn't pee my pants though.) (that time, anyway)

Lisa @ The Preacher's Wife said...

awwww! Poor Sweet Jordy! Will y'all come to Dade County for a meet? Tell me her schedule cuz I'd love to try to make one..

The fall cometh before the pride.. Now THAT is a new classic. :))

Janis said...

Poor Jordan! I agree about the unqualified coaches-I have had some experience with that with Jacob at RMS. I am glad she got up and kept going-what a girl!